


Head on down to HetaMart

by NotVerySorryHetalian



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-27 14:22:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19014673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotVerySorryHetalian/pseuds/NotVerySorryHetalian
Summary: It's a retail AU and I made it at roughly midnight and it's just a crack collection.





	1. MASTERLIST OF RETAIL.

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my personal Hell. Thanks for staying!  
> Be sure to bring snacks!!

{-HetaMart Masterlist-}

Store Manager: Rome/Romeo Gilbavares

 

Assistant Managers:  
-Prussia/ Gilbert Beilschmidt  


-England/ Arthur Kirkland  


-Spain/ Antonio Fernandez Carriedo 

-Deli Meats-  
{Russia}/ Ivan Braginsky  


Belarus/ Natalya Arlovskaya  


Latvia/ Raivis Galante  


Lithuania/ Toris Laurinaitis

-Frozen Section-  
{Sweden}/ Berwald Oxentierna.  


Norway/ Lukas Bondevik  


Finland/ Tino Väinämöinen 

Iceland/ Emil Steilsson 

Denmark/ Mathias Kohler 

-Backroom/Freight-

{Hungary}/ Elizabeta Héderváry

America/ Alfred .F. Jones 

Cuba/ Carlos Machado 

Hong Kong/ Li Xiao 

Germany/ Ludwig Beilschmidt 

Turkey/ Sadik Adnan 

Vietnam/Trần Chung Liên 

-Electronics-

{Estonia}/ Eduard von Bock 

Ukraine/ Katyusha Chernenko 

Lichtenstein/ Erika Vogel 

Switzerland/ Basch Zwingli 

Japan/ Kiku Honda 

-Delivery-

{Austria}/ Roderich Edelstein 

Italy/ Feliciano Vargas 

Romano/ Lovino Vargas 

-Pets-

{Greece}/ Heracles Karpusi 

Netherlands/ Abel Van der Berg 

Canada/ Matthew Williams 

Egypt/ Gupta Muhammad Hassan 

-Toys-

{Belgium}/ Emma Janssens 

Romania/ Vladimir Popescu 

China(!)/ Yao Wang 

Taiwan/ Xiao Mei 

-Pharmacy-

{China}(!)/ Yao Wang 

France/ Francis Bonnefoy 

Seychelles/ Michelle Bonnefoy 

Monaco/ Lucille Bonnefoy 

Poland/ Felix Łukasiewicz 

-Cashiers-

{Seborga} Romeo 'Lover-boy' Vargas 

Sealand/ Peter Kirkland 

Wy/ Charlie Kirkland 

Molossia/ Kevin Jones 

Hutt River/Jake Kirkland 

Kugelmugel/ Hugo Edelstein 

Ladonia/ Elias Oxentierna 

(!) China mainly works in Pharmacy but but travels over to Toys to help out. 

{} = Dept. Manager


	2. DAY 1 of the horror and torture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Feel free to suggest scenarios in the comments b'cuz Lord knows whats gonna happen with this.....mess.
> 
> Also, the school year is coming to an end so I'm gonna try to reach a good stopping point here so I can pick it up the next time I get back to school.

Down at your local HetaMart there's never a boring day. Berwald was searching the store for Mathias, his newest employee. Mathias had been closing their main section but never clocked out that night. Tino had been working with him that night and had assumed the Danish man left and had forgotten to clock out. Walking into the back room was a safe bet of finding him there. In the short span of two weeks working Mathias had already made friends with a few people. Alfred must've been working late because the American could barely keep his focus on the Swede. " Huh? Mathias? Last I saw of him he was back by the Deli freezer with some stuff in his hands." He yawned and promptly fell asleep. _Meh...I'll let him sleep. He's got an hour before 'Lizbet comes in for work,_ thought Berwald. The coat rack by the Deli freezer only had two jackets when there was normally three hung. Not that they were ever used anyway, all of the Deli workers had unnatural tolerance to the cold. Still, it was weird to see one jacket missing. Maybe Toris wasn't feeling well and taken a jacket. Berwald opened the door slightly and let out a high pitched squeak when it was violently shoved open by none other than Mathias himself. "I-I Hav-ve b-b-been st-st-stuck-k-k there all n-night." -Last Night-

Mathias was just about finished with restocking when he noticed some products that belonged to Ivan and his crew. Tino had left to go use the restroom so Mathias figured he could just do it on his own. He was very wrong. The freezer doors in his department stayed open on their own and could easily be pushed open should they close. Little did the Dane know but the meat locker doors lock when they close. Mathias jumped when the door clunked shut and went to open it and found it was locked. When Tino came back, Mathias was nowhere to be found. He tried calling out to him but there was no answer. Shrugging, Tino clocked out and went home to his his roommate Lukas. That was at 10 o clock Monday night.

-8 AM-

Yao opened the pharmacy and immediately regretted doing so. A 30-something year old woman strode up and snappily asked for a painkiller the pharmacy didn't carry any longer. "Ma'am, we don't carry this product--" She cut him off." Then HOW did I get this? HMM?" Yao "--This is expired. We stopped stocking this product months ago, aru." he sighed." Can I speak to your manager?" Yao stared at the woman " I'm the manager--" "No ,you're not. you don't have that air of authority about. I want to talk to YOUR manager." She tilted her chin up, trying to show her superiority over him. " Please wait here." he said with a fake smile. " I hope you find a new job after you get fired!" she trilled. As soon as he closed the door Yao huffed angrily. " I wANt tO SpEak To YOuR MAnAgeR!" Michelle mocked the woman, having heard the entire conversation. Her small frame was turned away, filling prescription bottles. Lucille came in chatting with Felix and both stopped at seeing Yao's face. "Girl, spill the tea. Why are you upset?" Felix crossed their arms. "....Stupid customer. Didn't believe I'm the manager." Yao pulled his hair up into a bun with a grim face. " How much you wanna bet her name is.....Susan?" Lucille's eyes lit up at the mention of a bet. " I'll bet she's a Karen. She's the right height and demeanor..." Soon the betting pool totaled up to roughly $200 dollars and a rather mysterious coupon for a free back rub.

Moment of truth time. Mr.Wang had bet at least 10 dollars on Deborah. As soon as he opened the door the woman screeched "You aren't the manager!! You're still the same guy from before!! I DEMAND TO SEE YOUR MANAGER RIGHT NOW." She slammed her hand on the counter top. "Ma'am if you don't stop making a scene I WILL escort you from the premises, understood?" The woman sputtered and coughed like an engine trying to turn over. Security lurked in the background should the lady try anything......violent. Yao waved Jett off and calmly started the woman down." Can I get your name so I can add it to the watch list?" Yao asked with a fake smile. " My name is Karen Smith and I hope I never see you again 'Yao' " she hissed with a sneer. Thus, Matthew in Pets won the wager and ended his shift $200 dollars richer but left the coupon behind.

-12 pm-

Ludwig walked in to work for the first time. He knew almost nobody there except for his big brother, who somehow works in management. He sat in in the back waiting for his actual shift to start so he could clock in. A rather tall child walked over and sat down. He had a cast on his right hand that he must've doodled on be cause DAMN there were cats and dogs drawn all over it. An awkward silence hung in the room so Ludwig tried to make a friend. " So..... What did you to your arm? " The other man jumped and whacked the injured arm on the bench. " AIYEE-HEE-HEE!!! OWWWW." Ludwig reeled back, terrified of what he had just done. " oH MEIN GOTT I am so sorry!!" The smaller man sniffled a little. "No, I-it's fine. My name's Feliciano but my friends call me Feli." He asked through a pained smile while he held his arm down. Ludwig held out his left hand not thinking about who he was greeting. " Ah. Oops....My name is Ludwig. I just got hired here actually--What is with your face right now?" Feli had started to bounce slightly and had an excited grin on his face. " You mean you're Gil's little brother?!" Ludwig sighed inwardly, of course the man-child knows his brother." Ja. I am. I need to go start my shift now.....Nice meeting you, Feliciano." He briskly walked into the backroom and clocked in. As he turned around he nearly ran over a small Japanese man.

-2 pm-

Antonio held a carton of raspberries close to his chest. To an onlooker, it would seem this man liked raspberries a lot but anyone who personally knew the guy would know that there's probably something in them. The Assistant Manager had brought in his 4 turtles disguised as raspberries and the guise seemed to be working, Arthur didn't notice the tiny turtle heads poking out to munch on the real raspberries in the box. A customer needed help and the carton of Turtle-berries got set down and left on a table. When Antonio came back, the carton was nowhere to be found. *oH fUC--* The Spaniard whipped around trying to find his terrapin children.

"Assistant Manager Fernandez Carriedo, would you please come to the break room?"

Arthur must have found them...Oh well, at least a customer didn't try to buy them. In the break room sat Arthur and Lovi's other brother sat waiting with the turtles in a Tupperware outside of the carton of raspberries. " So, care to explain this?" Arthur tapped his foot impatiently. " My turtles?! _Oh no! How did_ they  _get here?--_ "Antonio lied through his teeth. One turtle made a beeline straight for the edge of the table where Antonio's elbow sat. "GAH! TIPSY NO." Arthur's frown deepened. He sighed and scooped up the stray turtles, putting them back in the carton." Mr. Carriedo....Have you forgotten the policy on bringing animals into this establishment? " Antonio smirked.

"Bring in your animals......always??" The comment earned a few snickers from the other workers nearby.

 


End file.
